I still havent managed, to not let actions of others, define how I feel. Hence: I havent snapped out of it. Read the definition of depression and its exactly how I feel these days. Writing it all out is useless. I dont even know why I get up anymore. It feels like I have to give everything that means something to me away. And its not even my own choice. Others decide. Life is difficult these days. As I fight to motivate myself for anything. It IS bad. 😥 I just wish that I would understand, why people do this to people. It is beyond me, and no one I talk to, can explain it. I wish I could be as worryfree as Emma:

Most difficult it is. My skin is having haydays, as it gets worse and worse and worse and I find myself back in the days, where I do nothing but play around with my skin all day and it is way to visible on the outside what is going on on the inside. While people in my delivery area keep trashing their problems on me and I just want to scream all day. 😕

In meinem Krankenzimmer herrschte ein Kommen und Gehen. Ärzte, die Stationsschwester und ihre Schar von Pflegerinnen in gestärkten Trachten und gummibesohlten Schuhen. Vordergründig schien sich die Geschichte zu wiederholen. Ein Sanatorium in Sussex, ein Krankenhaus in Fois, ein Patient, der mit dem Leben nicht zurechtkam. ~ Kate Morton: Winter Ghosts

Must concentrate on the positives. My brother went to get the for now last George Martin book for me and a friend spoiled me with cake:

Another reason to feel better: I can hardly concentrate on reading. the brilliant plot of book 5.1 seems to just pass me by. Shame. But the cake was delicious!

There was so much mail this past week. With elections coming up and the school start… disgusting. I hate it when I feel worn out before 6 am. 😳 People are pissed when they get their mail later, too. Some just cant understand, that the more work we have, the longer it takes. Yes people are so much more stupid than one would ever think.

Foodwise, I have found my love for Overnight Oats. My God, so good! I love to put a bit of honey and peanut butter in and you can throw whatever fresh fruit you have by hand in, too: so good. Here is one breakfast with apple, peanut butter and honey and one with banana, joghurt, honey and pumpkin jam:

I also made Apple Crumble, which is a fast and really yummy treat, plus the plate fits perfectly on a mug rug I made long ago 😉



I finally forced myself to get back on my Inline Skates, which could use new wheels. They are obviously not made out to be used that much… but still fun, just more exhausting:



I hardly did any sewing this week, I just made one pouch, which didnt turn out that nice… I didnt even bother to get a nice photograph of it… 😳

Inspired by a friend, I decided to to make Pumpkin Jam yesterday:

Either it was a bad recipe or I made it wrong, but it doesnt taste nice at all. Good thing it is only three glasses. I will put it in our oats bit by bit, but I will definitely not put in on bread ever again. Yikes! 😈 I love the colour of it though. 🙂 I want to make honey lemon jam and apple cinamon rum jam next. 🙂

Emmchen has been brilliant this week. Lots of kisses and cuddles.

Keep on trying. Always. ➡