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Das Verschwinden des Josef

by Olivier Guez

-1325 days until until long birthday weekend. oh no

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A Bigger Miracle

I finished a brilliant book yesterday: Das größere Wunder by Thomas Glavinic, which just proves, that you can come across good books often by pure luck. Its about a man´s search for something, and even though all his wishes are fullfilled, he cannot seem to find what he is looking for except in situations of life and death, in a spurt of a moment. And this thrill of the second, as I understood it, makes him look for more and more extremer things. Is it a wonder that he decided to climb Mount Everest? This book is beautifully written. Very seldomly I was drawn into the storyline like in this book. It felt like I was climbing Everest. :mrgreen: This book shows that its not all about the possibility and plausibility, but rather how cleverly someone packages the complete unreal. Really recommended. Needless to say, I have been obsessed with everything I could find that deals with this specific mountain. There are brilliant documentations on YouTube. Absolutely amazing. ❗

Since my last entry it was Austrias National day. Google´s Icon for the day was totally brilliant:

I didnt even want to imagine, but there was so much mail when I returned to work on Monday. Hardly anything was delivered while I was in the hospital. Good God. I cant remember when I ever had that much mail. 😡

My skin made a turn for the worse quite fast again. Not even a day after going home. It began coming back already while I was still in the hospital. People stared at it of course on my first day back and I havent felt like such a failure and hopeless case in quite a while. It was absolutely not nice. Good thing I had an appointement with the doctor in chief on Thursday. Sidenote: he has been really nice the last few times that I saw him! I am now supposed to wrap myself in plastic after putting steroid creme on, this is called occlusiv. It multiplies the strength of the steroid creme. In combination with the Antibiotics that I still have to take, my skin is improving again. Happy. 😀 I have also started to take Imurek again (instead of the MTX). I am not sure if this was a smart choice, I have to reconsider if I want to keep taking it. Gene test came back normal, yippie, I am a Wildtype. 😀 So relieved, I was worried there for a while.

It has cooled down and tea plus chestnut season has started *mmmmmmh*. Looooooove it! 😀

I have come around Funzees and I totally want one! Either I am getting it for myself for my birthday or for Christmas. If only brother would work again and earn some money, it would make my life so much easier! 😥 I think you all should get Funzees for yourself! Plus another idea for Christmas: Lov Organic: BRILLIANT!

I met good people again in the hospital. One woman from Serbia and I met someone again who I often met on the ward before. We want to meet up soon. I collected recipes again. I am going to make the apple cake in a bit.

Talking with people really helps me put things that I am stuck on in perspective. I have also had a really good therapy session again, as well on Monday. She is trying to get me to not make myself smaller than I already am. Hmmm. Difficult. I know I do not want to have people stare at my skin and thats a big reason why I keep my head down. This will be difficult to fix.

I have started to play Neopets again. I do not have any time for it, but it is fun!

On Friday was All Saints Day. The day where the Roman Catholic Church remembers the Dead, by standing at the graveside while a priest goes around to bless the graves. Everyone is terribly depressed and sad. Hence: my brother and I did not attend. Which doesnt mean that we dont cherish our parents and remember them every single day! But I feel that the time of religion is nearing its end. Not meant blasphemic in any sort of way. I rather have candles burning at home every day and tell people what good people they were rather then exposing myself to a stuation that I dont find appropriate anymore and which does nothing but makes us feel sad along with hundreds of other people standing nearby -> the power of the group -> I do not even want to imagine. *shudders* Difficult to explain. I guess to summarize it: I dont have to stand at their grave to remember and cherish them. I can do the same thing feeling good about it everywhere else.

On Wednesday, I have to go to our Bezirksgericht, a lower-level court, because someone in my delivery area hasnt paid his rental and he didnt pick up the letter that the court has sent him. Sigh. As if I didnt have to do enough already. They need to write a protocol of how I delivered the letter and what do I know. No big deal. No difference anymore if I wrestle with the professors at Uni, the doctor in chief at the hospital or someone at court… I am used to it by now. 😳

Having come in contact again with a cancer patient, melanoma, it has strengthened me to make the absolute best of every single day. Life can be over before you know it and it can happen to absolutely everyone. Dont wait for a special day to do something. Do it now and treat yourself well, every single second of the day. Treat others with respects, you never know the reason why the behave the way they do. It could mean the world to them! And of course, dont ban someone from your life.

Unistress. Ewwww. Do something nice for yourself, NOW! Hugs and Love. xxx : 😎

3 Responses to “A Bigger Miracle”

  1. Reply to this comment
    10:20 pm on November 3rd, 2013

    Nur schnell zum Funzee – ich hatte lange Zeit nur solche Pyjamas, doch wenn du aufs Klo musst als Mädel ist mir das zu kalt – doch das Gefühl fehlt mir schon.

    Ich gehe nie zu den Gräbern meiner lieben Vorverstorbenen, die sind sowieso immer bei mir – das andere ist nur Show für “die Leute”.

  2. Reply to this comment
    10:42 am on November 10th, 2013

    @Anu: Das ist echt ein Argument… hmmmm.

    Ja, seh ich genau wie du. Das Grabstehen ist für die Leute, nicht für die Verstorbenen. 😯 Die katholische Kirsche… 👿 ❗ 😡 Hauptsache danach fühlt sich jeder erst richtig schlecht.

  3. Reply to this comment
    8:20 pm on November 12th, 2013

    Siehste – ich finde, die könnte so ne Klappe mit Druckknöpfe anbringen wie bei den Kinderlatzhosen zum Windelnwechseln, dann würde nur das Popöchen kühl wie sonst auch 😉

    Da stimme ich dir voll und ganz zu, wo wir doch alle mit Evas Erbsünde geboren wurden *narf*

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... und in der schwärzesten Nacht meines Lebens sah ich Sterne.
Der Schatten des Windes