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Das Verschwinden des Josef

by Olivier Guez

-1366 days until until long birthday weekend. oh no

Last FM
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Chilling In And Out

This week brought back the regular routine. 😈 And I hated it. Going back to work after having off is getting more and more difficult. I feel that its incredibly exhausting and they expect more and more from us, which is just not realistic and it is pulling on my nerves and capabilities. Had to drink gallons of hot chocolate to make up for it. 😆 It brings the money in is all I can say.

But this made my week pretty much, absolutely brilliant:

Monday, I also started one of the coolest seminars I ever had at Uni: Film Analysis, the bad in movies. We are going to watch one horror movie each week in the evening, and discuss it in the following seminar hours. Tomorrow we are going to watch The Silence Of The Lambs. 😎 They demand a lot of effort, but its something I never had before.

On Tuesday, I went to the hospital for the regular skin check-up. With a brand new doctor I have never seen before. She was bloody young, meaning she just finished her studies. The new head of the dermatology ward was with us the first few minutes. I love to be greeted with “we are going to do a special blood draw to test for a certain gen to give you a treament you havent had before”. Superbe. *sarcastic pun intended* They forgot to mention which gen and which treatment that is and stupid me forgot to ask, or rather: I didnt dare to ask. I saw later that they are testing for mutations in my Filaggrin gen, because you need to sign gen testing, apparently knowing of certain genes and mutations of these genes will make treatment predictable. This had me stressed all week, trying to decide if I want to know the outcome or not. Right now I dont think I want to know. I dont need to know everything. 💡 We also increased my dose of immune suppressants. Ever since, I have been tired as hell. 😮 Reminding me that this is pure poison.

The rest of the week is a big blurr. Yesterday, I gave in and took steroids. Eczema went to my eyes on Friday, and I could barely see, made doing anything for Uni absolutely impossible! Also skin was acting up more than I could take. So Emma and me tried to chill first, worked for her not for me:

Today, I made good progress on Bachelor Paper 1, pretty much done with text writing. I really hope I can finish it this week. I have a minor test on Wednesday. Maybe after that is done. 🙂 Also the statistics are out for the exam in which I got an A, yay! They didnt give everyone a good grade after all, feeling very proud now!


I started reading The Golem And he Jinni, which is a bit tedious to read. I have 500 pages left to go, room for improvement. 😎

Bad new of the week… as there always are bad news it seems… the therapist I went to over the last year decided to stop her private practice. 😯 I cannot believe it. We made an appointement to talk about my future therapy wise, but quite honestly, I dont think that I want to start all new having to tell it all again. This doesnt do me any good. Its a real shame. 😡 I am a little bit pissed, that she told me in the hospital that I could come and seee her privately, she must have known that she wanted to stop. Not fair or bad luck. Argh.

I wish the male world would realize this:

Who knows what life will bring. So glad I dont know. Forever glad! I also learned this week, that some people are predictable. More shame.

Have a very good St. Patricks Day, especially Lucy! ➡ I leave you with my lab-pet at Neopets, because its dressed to the occassion! Take care of yourselves, ALWAYS! ➡


2 Responses to “Chilling In And Out”

  1. Reply to this comment
    4:26 am on March 17th, 2014

    Happy St. Pat’s to you too Connie!!! You made my day with your lab pet…perfect!!!

    Congrats on your A! Boo, hiss on any bad stuff in your life. Enjoy that film class…sounds like a lot of fun!!!! 😉

  2. Reply to this comment
    7:21 pm on March 17th, 2014

    Muss nicht sein, dass die Therapeutin dies wusste – auch solche Menschen müssen manchmal schnell Anpassungen in ihren Leben vornehmen, weil irgendetwas vorfällt.

    Ich kenne das Gefühl allerdings, da mich meine damals ja auch so beschissen hat hängen lassen, nachdem sie mich vorher auch noch bei der IV in die Pfanne gehauen hat.

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