Interesting week in form of life lessons.
The week started with the death of a work colleague. He crossed the road behind a bus, a car hit him, he was dead immediately. Took me a while to digest. People who learn about the passing of my parents, always ask me, if it was an accident. I thought about this a lot. I think I would have a heck of a time dealing with an accident, than I do with “their” deaths.
What did I learn from this? That death is so much closer than we think. How often do I cross the road without looking? How insane do I drive on my bike? Why on earth do I drive/walk/bike when the traffic sign is red? Chances are high that when a car hits you, you will die. I am so often “really tired of life”. But do I want death? Its like “she” sais at Girl Interrupted. Seeing death, really seeing it, makes thinking about it, fucking ridiculous! I have seen it twice. Their is no dignity in death. Just like House always sais.
Second lesson. I always listen to Podcasts when I bike anywhere. I think biking is painfully boring, I do need something my brain can work with. And my thoughts are not always the smartest choice. 😯 I had picked something for todays ride to my guitar lesson, but when I clicked on it, something else started, as I was in a hurry, I had no time to change it. There are no coincidences.
The Podcast that started, was an interview with Ursula Karven. I had no idea who she was before. She is an actress, and her son drowned some years ago in Pamela Andersons pool. Anyway, she said some interesting things. I always like to talk to people, too, and take the things that are useful for me, and make them my own. Same with books, movies, whatever. Anyway. She said: The past brings pain, the future fear. There really is just the hear and now. Something else I liked is when she said that All w´s bring pain. Why, where, when… Plus she quoted “Lord Of The Rings”. When Frodo questions why he was burdened with the one ring. Gandalf replies So do all who see such times. But that is not for us to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that we are given.
Those things my soul needs. Constantly.
Right now I could sit in the opera Ariana von Nexos. Unfortunately, it collided with my guitar lesson. But as everything happens for a purpose… who knows what good will come from not going there. waits patiently






6:02 am on January 19th, 2008
Condolences on the loss of your work colleague.
All *w*s bring pain…interesting. I must think about that.
11:04 am on January 20th, 2008
solche “zufälle” sind gut.
“Those things my soul needs. Constantly.”
yep.
3:27 pm on January 22nd, 2008
I’m sorry for your lost of a colleague. ; ;
12:47 am on January 26th, 2008
Oh crumbs. Yes, I can understand – there was a boy in my village, my age, who got killed around Christmas time who was in a car.
How is guitar going? Sorry I haven’t been around recently.
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