Argh. 😥 I am such an abnormal person. My nerves are just not made for concerts.

I was really shaking badly, long before it was my turn to play. My turn came, and I kept shaking. I didn´t make errors, but I missed “a lot” of notes, due to the shaking. Maybe it was not that obvious, but it was to me, and I felt horrible, I wanted to dig a hole and jump in it. He said I should bow, I kept looking away down everywhere but the audience. *eww*

I am abnormal, I am so embarrased. I felt that I made so many errors, that I really didn´t deserve any applause, and should just vanish becaude I had failed.

After the concert my guitar teacher said that he can´t understand how I can get so disturbed by such little things, that it went really well, and that I shouldn´t worry.

Someones Mom later told me how good it was. She was impressed how we got through the 7 pages in that enormous speed.

Even if every person on this planet would tell me so, I still wouldn´t believe it. I just cannot live up to my expectations. I really wish I would have behaved more normally, too.

And this is, why I do not want to play at concerts. Because I always end up depressed.

They kept applauding after every page, because they thought we were done, that was the fun part. 😀 We kept shaking our heads, hehe.