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Das Verschwinden des Josef

by Olivier Guez

-1063 days until until long birthday weekend. oh no

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Ausrasten verboten.

Such a long time without a proper blog post again, so sorry! I meant to blog so often, but then I never managed to sit down and do it. Masses has happened since! Not all of it good, some things far from being acceptable. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Eating on my nerves and mood but trying to stay above it which is most difficult, especially as we are having a massive heat wave ☀☀☀ which makes everything, even just existing, almost not possible!

My flowers and herbs are growing nicely. I may have gone a little overboard with my passion for gardening, but I love coming home and seeing so much life infront of our house, it is lovely! I have sunflowers growing which I seeded myself. Everything that is growing and living is good.

  • Confetti-Flowers at windowsill.
  • The start...
  • ... it has grown in quantity and size since then!
  • Flower pots.
  • Sunflower seedlings.
  • So much growth, thank you sun!
  • My favourite flowers.

My REHA was approved. THANK GOD! I was so relived when I got the letter and jumped around the distribution center, so very happy that I can get away! Everything is set and I am flying to the Dead Sea in Israel September 7th for at least 4 weeks, weheeeee! I desperatley need to get away from brother as what he is doing and how he is doing it or rather not doing beyond words. I have no idea how he can live with himself every single day.

Apparently there is a new worldwide eczema study starting in the fall, not so sure I will be a part of it. REHA first, maybe discussing this new experimental drug with doctors there who have good heart and mean well. Actually, I am so sick of humanity, no matter in which area of life it is. What I keep saying lately is: the worst that could have happened to us is oter human beings.

I had a lovely walk with Luise, Eugen and Emma a few weeks ago. It was really nice and Emma enjoyed it a lot, too.

  • Joyous Emma.
  • Salzach View
  • Another Salzach View
  • Little doggie exhausted.
  • Emma. <3

At the end of June the Austrian Postal Service had a huge campagne going which was also an attempt to break the world record in having the biggest firm relay in the world: Mission Susi. The mission was to bring a birthday present from a little girl to another little girl from the very west of Austria to the very East in under 48 hours, over the weeked. One postal worker would run with a bagbag on her / his back and just like in a relay, after a certain amount of kilometers, the bag would be given to the next postal worker who would then run for a while, this was repeated until Vienna was reached. I really wanted to run the relay, but was too late to sign up, but I did run the grouprun. Which basically was running behind the relay runner for 4,6 kilometers. It was so much fun! I am even in the best of video and in the postal worker magazine of this month, too cool! We also all got a cool (but way cheap!) Puma Running Tshirt. Being part of something special, makes you special. Even if it has to do with work.

Last weekend I had another kidney stone. It started pretty much exactly a week ago, late Friday evening. Massive pain, lots of throwing up. (‘﹏*๑) So we went to the ER, they took me in immediately, I got lots of pain meds before being transported to the urology department. We decided I should stay, so I stayed for two days before the kidney stone popped out and I went home. Not much longer and I would have had surgery, yikes! Hated it last time!!! I guess even though I am drinking lots, it might just not be enough to NOT get kidney stones.

  • In the middle of the night, I moved into a most lovely hospital room.
  • Most luxuries room ever!
  • Aside the obvious, being alone was quite relaxing.
  • Hospital park.
  • Own shower.
  • View from window.
  • Goodbye.

I havent said it in a while, but I love Salzburg! So very pretty, especially with weather like this :

Emma is AMAZING, I love her so much! So many cuddles and kisses per day, what would I ever do without her:

I got new books yesterday and today I had ice cream with Luise in the city, I would almost say life is good, if there wasnt this and that! But as I try to concentrate on good things… in all of my desperation…

What is there to do than to enjoy life? I am trying to, I hate to waste any time on being sad and depressed. Sometimes I cannot help it, even though I know most of it has to do with brother. What a huge burden he is. I will get over it, I must! So much to do for Uni, I just have no time for being so upset. I am not even sure I am all too happy and excited for my vacation, as it will mean more time with brother. IF ONLY… These are the times when I miss all people lost the most. Must remember:

LIFE WILL GO ON! Think pink! And dont forget to keep chasing butterflies…

One Response to “Ausrasten verboten.

  1. Reply to this comment
    7:26 pm on July 26th, 2015

    Congrats on acceptance Connie! I hope this time really, truly helps improve your condition.

    STAY COOL & enjoy Emma & her massive, kissing tongue!!!

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